today's topic:
are u happier now? stumbled over this qn since we were talking about this at starbucks. hahaa
well, i don't actually.
i can say its the worst year of my whole 19 years.
of coz meeting my bf was one of the
best things that happened in my life, but this year is the year that is full of uncertainties. it is so uncertain to the point that it is damn frustrating but u cant do anything about it other than to wait, wait and wait. even if u wait damn long in the end they give u a rejection letter,
so no news is NOT good news, it means the worst has yet to come. lol.
sec sch days were not bad apart from CCA. haha. i met the best of friends there and enjoyed DNT (wierd i know XD). i actually felt
proud bringing my A3 folio here and there.
JC days were good, i can say i was feeling the best. CCA was good, experienced SYF again after YEARS. lol. though i keep failing tests, cried over stupid stuffs in sch (
thank u JPET), don't know why i still have the driving force to go to school, do tutorials, etc etc. i think it was the belief that i will pass the next upcoming test. LOLOL. but i rarely pass lah, even if pass its borderline.
but i really mugged, what else can i do?after A's were work and enjoy, while thinking how's my paper. lol.
uncertainties; speculation..
after A's results, uncertainties again. of coz my results arent great, like O levels. at least after O's u already know aga aga where u are going, its only a matter of choosing. i can say my A's results were the best i can go already. have u seen me pass my chemistry exams b4? lol.
i feel that its already the best for me, but its not good for the unis. so options were up again; poly, retake, SIM. of coz retake option is obviously close for me, I really dont want to study, i dislike mugging for A's. Poly, 2 years, means new life, new friends, new atmosphere, and if u know me, i hate new things. LOL. =x im even reluctant to go uni. but anyhow, i've applied for SIM and went for the DE interview. even then, i think its hard for me to get in too. Its different from the degree courses. haix. so if my appeals dont get thru and SIM rejects me,
i'll really end up nowhere. so at that time, new options will be up for me.
so u see the reasons, why i hate this year. lol. and i'll start to have no common topics, no common understanding. i hate alll these now. cant i just marry now and be a housewife? even though i sounds shallow, no knowledge, stupid, blah, its still good life u know. hahaa. and i hate it when ppl ask me where am i now, or which uni im heading to. coz im still a lost and wandering soul. haix. how long am i going to suffer until?
of coz along this way, there are several ppl to thank..
BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG THANKS TO ANNA, JPET and XY for the countless suggestions and consoles. hahaa, esp anna, discussed big time, and helped me a lot by offering me lots of options and her research from forums. XY who also offered me options too, all the best for ur interview k!!!
JPET, good souls will be blessed. u are always there since the day i met u and helped me in A LOT of ways, though u are busy with ur work and sk. so continue to be brave =]. it is thanks to u all, which made me feel hopeful again. =]
really, i am super glad to have u 3 girls.
and there is my
TEKONG BOYYYY (POP-ED!), who is not beside me physically, but ur daily calls and weekly meet-ups made me feel better too..
GINGER, who helped me with my nus appeal..
JAKE, who accompanied me to SIM for my interview, though u had to go there as well.
yeap that's all about it. pretty emo post coz i had lots of flashbacks. LOL.
like how i came so far?
